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The
call centre industry is still thriving, despite World
War Three, the Dot Com crash, and the r-word (recession,
for those of you who are still wondering).
In
this crazy world it is sometimes a comforting thought
to know that you can still make a half decent living from
saying "hellomynameisjohnathanhowcanihelpyou?"
many, many, hundreds of times per day.
The
facts are as follows:
Ireland
is the call centre capital of Europe. Yeah, yeah. But
what's in it for YOU?
The
constant supply of Jobs: They're not looking for heavy
qualifications or MENSA membership. Can you communicate,
yes or no? If you can, well done - you are a homo sapiens.
You have qualified to work in your local call centre.
The
constant supply of Young People: Generally, call centre
contracts last for three to nine months. Meaning there
is constantly new blood in the office. Moreover, generally
speaking you will be working with eighteen to thirty year
olds. Some kind of party vibe is inevitable…
The
Europeans: Mmmm, yes. Europeans. And not just the
pale freckly kind, either. You will be subjected to a
barrage of fresh-faced, long-limbed, golden-complexioned,
honey-haired people of all varieties. They're there to
ply their trades as multilingual agents, and to get to
know Ireland a little better ("the people are lovely").
Who better to show them around than a real-live Irish
person?
The
Organized Fun: Aw… Bless. In the true spirit
of cheesy Americanism, there will be barbecues, obstacle
courses, tug-o-war's, football, football and more football.
If this is what melts your butter, and it can be deceptively
seductive in the right circumstances, then you're at your
auntie's.
The
Team Spirit: Unlikely though it may seem, you will
almost certainly grow to love the random bunch of misfits
that make up your team. It's a bit like Irish College
that way.
The
Money: Its steady. Its not backbreaking labour. It
starts at about £7.40 per hour. Some better, some
worse.
The
Hours: Often 9 to 5:30. Best student opportunities
are evening shifts and weekends. Look out for 5-9 shifts,
depending on which lectures you can afford to miss and
how poor you are you can usually squeeze in another couple
of shifts per week.
The
Boredom: hellomynameishellomynameishellomynameis…
all work and no play makes slim shady a dull boy. You
could be wielding an axe before long.
The
Career: Look like you can put your shoes on the right
feet and tell time and they will promote you. Better money,
but more responsibility.
Further
Information
What to do if you feel you want to work in a call centre:
Take two aspirin and call me in the morning. If the feeling
doesn't go away, visit www.nixers.com
and we'll sort you out.
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